New employee asks to shadow coworker to learn the job, gets offended when accused of copying his work: 'She said I was blocking her professional growth'

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Ally Perry • Writer and Editor
Nov 25, 2025 9:00 AM EST

Supporting a coworker doesn't mean doing their job for them.

The reality of being that much-desired good team player is that we have to be amenable and helpful to our colleagues. Like it or not, most employers expect those who work for them to bring this kind of attitude. Depending on what coworkers we end up with, it can be a struggle.

Still, there are definite benefits to being the individual who gets along with those in the workplace. When your colleagues like you, it generally makes a job easier—unless they wind up having an ulterior motive that you are going to pay a price for. Sometimes, differentiating between the support that is all part of the job and that which is going to get you nowhere isn't easy. People can be sneaky and try to take advantage of the generosity that those they work with may feel required to give.

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  • a man drinks from a coffee mug while a woman leans on the desk in front of them and looks at a laptop screen
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • In this story, a long-term employee felt like he had been put in a difficult spot when his newer coworker kept asking to shadow him while he was working, so that she could learn more about how their workplace operated. Initially, he agreed to this arrangement because he felt it was important to help her feel comfortable in her role.

    However, he started to get suspicious when this colleague began reporting tasks that he had completed as those that she had done herself. When she asked to shadow him again, he refused, and she got upset, claiming that this was hindering her ability to do her job. He wanted a second opinion.

  • AITJ refusing to let my coworker shadow me after she kept using my work to look good?

    I have been at my job for a few years and I have built a strong reputation for being dependable. A newer coworker keeps asking to shadow me so she can learn the workflow. At first I agreed because I wanted to help her adjust. Then I started noticing something strange. She would stand behind me while |
    via ThroatRelevant4027
  • handled tasks then report those tasks as her own when speaking to our manager. She began telling everyone she was the one who solved issues that I had worked on alone.
    via ThroatRelevant4027
  • a woman's hands wearing a smartwatch and typing on a laptop
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    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • Last week she asked again if she could spend the day following me. I told her I was not comfortable with her shadowing me anymore. She got defensive and said I was blocking her professional growth. I told her I was not blocking anything but I would not allow my
    via ThroatRelevant4027
  • work to be claimed by someone else. She ended up crying in the break room and now several coworkers think I was too harsh. I feel like I have been patient but enough is enough.
    via ThroatRelevant4027
  • a male and female coworker have a discussion while leaning on a desk, with the woman holding a tablet
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • Serious-Agency-3005 She is not learning from you. She is piggybacking on your effort to boost her image. Protecting your work is not cruelty. It is basic fairness.
    via Serious-Agency-3005
  • Intelcourier Your coworker is a thief. She is stealing your work and effort, then presenting it as her work and effort. Tell the coworkers who think you are being too harsh that they can turn over their work to her and let her take credit for it.
    via Intelcourier
  • Haunting-Owl-2107 NTJ - she's a two-faced bitch!
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  • Swansboy NTJ, report it to your manager, she crying because you found her out
    via Swansboy
  • Sea-Ad9057 You should have let her shadow face fix a problem them present the real fix after
    via Sea-Ad9057
  • No-Abalone4897 NTA. Why doesn't she shadow other co- workers? You can't claim my reports as yours, then cry when you get called out. She'll be fine. She must choose another person and don't apologize cause you did nothing wrong by telling her how uncomfortable it is to work with her.
    via No-Abalone4897
  • dtj55902 Turn the shadowing into a different proposition. At the point of a choice, suddenly turn to her and say "Okay, what would you do?". Whatever she says, ask why. Basically add friction to the transaction. Also, document what you did with her, and send it to your boss, maybe one level up, and her on the CC line. Basically shine a light on her use of your time and effort.
    via dtj55902
  • Thumper256 NTJ. Blocking her professional development?? LOL, she's new and you're the only one who already gave her a learning opportunity. Unless you were assigned and paid to train her, it's absolutely your prerogative to choose to stop.
    via Thumper256
  • Hopefully she starts to pull her own weight or your manager connects the dots about what's going on with her without you needing to fully expose her.
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  • shotzi7 Let her shadow someone else that thinks you were too harsh. Fuck that. You start messing with my job, you gotta go.
    via shotzi7
  • GrammaBear707 NTJ. Tell her you do not appreciate her taking credit for your work and leave it at that. The coworkers who think you are being harsh can let her shadow them and do she can be credited for their work instead of yours.
    via GrammaBear707
  • RJack151 NTJ. Let all the workers know what she has been doing. Let her be treated like the user she is.
    via RJack151
  • Which Witch9402 NTJ. Please have a meeting with your boss to tell them why you won't allow her to shadow you.
    via WhichWitch9402
  • Cynical OptimistSF Go to HR on Monday and report her for both credit stealing and causing a hostile workplace through emotional manipulation.
    via CynicalOptimistSF
  • Sweaty Technician_90 NTJ, you weren't harsh you were just telling her the truth. She deserved it.
    via Sweaty_Technician_90

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